Reasons to Stop Blogging… even though I never really will

Where in the world have I been?

It’s been way too long since a blog post, I realize.  And I was contemplating just giving it up altogether.

My reasons?

Well, for some reason, this blog puts pressure on me.  I can’t explain it.  But when I write something I’m putting myself “out there” and if no one comments, then I think I suck.  Or if it’s really good and I get a lot of comments, I feel like “how am I going to top that?”

And then there’s the whole idea of strangers reading my blog.  And honestly, complete strangers don’t bother me.  The mommies from other states or whatever.  That’s fine.  It’s the people who I kinda know that might find me through facebook or mutual friends and then they’re reading my blog and watching me live my life and not leaving comments, so I don’t really know they are there, but they are.  Like a stalker.  That I kinda know.  Okay I’m talking about ex-boyfriends.  It freaks me out that ex-boyfriends might be reading my blog!  We cut ties, people!  I don’t want contact.  Especially if they aren’t owning up to their stalking ways.  I don’t even know if they really are stalking me, but just the thought that they might be, freaks me out!  I mean, honestly, I’m totally stalkable material, right?  Right?

I sound crazy, right? But that’s not news.  Really.  Ya’ll knew I was crazy.

Then there’s the thought that strangers (not ex-boyfriends or mommies from other states, but weirdos) are really reading about my kids.  It’s just kinda weird.  And Oprah has gotten me all paranoid that there’s a child molester around every corner.  Which according to the Megan’s Law website, there kinda IS!  What if there’s someone reading my blog that IS a child molester and they’re printing out pictures of my kids like that one guy on Desperate Housewives who had that kid shrine in his basement.  *shiver me timbers*  Or the guy from Silence of the Lambs.  What if there’s a freak like the guy from Silence of the Lambs reading my blog?!?!  Then what?  Huh?  Then what?

I’m not the type of mommy blogger that is all discreet and only shows pictures of the back of my kids heads or makes up names for my kids like “Peter Pan” and “Simba,” because frankly there just aren’t enough cute male Disney characters, unless I start naming them after mice and ducks.  But if you sit and think about this stuff for too long, it’s just a wee bit freaky, right?

The world is a scary, scary place.

Alright, maybe not that scary, but still…

And finally, my kids are getting older.  I mean, my oldest is in kindergarten, but I have thought about how he’s going to feel one day if he reads my blog.  Is he going to be embarrassed about some of the stuff I’ve shared?  Or will he think it’s funny, as we all think it is, right?  Will he feel like we’re laughing with him, or at him?   It’s one thing to talk about my almost-5-year-old who still defiantly wets his pants on facebook to my 337 close and personal friends (haha) but putting it out in the blogosphere… kinda embarrassing… but maybe that’ll teach him to stop peeing in his pants, for heaven’s sake!

So, anywho, that’s what I’ve been thinking about and that’s why I’ve been gone for so long.

But it’s nice that some of you have facebooked me and said you’ve missed me, and the others that have “liked” that comment… that’s nice.  Those little blue “thumbs up” really make me feel special.

So, I’ll be back.  Me, Peter Pan, Simba, Nemo, and Sulley have a lot of updates to tell you all about.

I think I’ll adopt the name Mrs. Incredible for myself… for obvious reasons.

Why I’m Not Forever 21

My friend Jessica is going to take family portraits for us this weekend.  So I, of course, was on the hunt for the perfect outfit.  I’ve found it’s easier for me to buy a really cute new outfit and then rummage around in the boys closets to find something that matches me.

What?  It’s true.

Anywho, after I had unsuccessfully scoured a few stores I decided to venture in to Forever 21.  Why, you ask?  Not real sure.  I’m not a regular at Forever 21, but my best guess would be that I was feeling sorta desperate and there is a two-story Forever 21 right down the street from me, so I thought I would give it a go.

Bad idea.

Very, very bad idea.

I just don’t belong there.  And here is a list of my reasons why:

1.  I’m not 21.  I don’t feel like I’m 21.  I don’t even wish I was 21. I really don’t understand why anyone would want to be 21 forever anyway.  I mean, it was cool, but not that cool.  32 is waaaay cooler, right?  Right?  High five?  Anyone?

2.  When I walked in, the salesgirl greeted me and as I looked up and saw her wearing a wide-brimmed black hat with a white feather in it, I thought she was in costume.  I thought she was joking.  Like, she was trying on a go-back or something.  When I realized she wasn’t, I really questioned if that was in fashion.  Then I started to question my own taste in fashion.  Am I totally out?  I swear five minutes ago, I was confident in my own fashion tastes, but I think I might be out. Blogosphere, I beg of you, let me know, am I out?  Are wide-brimmed hats perfectly acceptable indoor attire?

3.  After skimming through a rack of horizontally striped shirts (which was every rack in the whole store, by the way) I looked around and wondered if anyone else thought the music they were playing was just a notch too loud.  I kinda wanted to pull a Ross and gesture the manager with my hands to quiet down and lower the volume just a smidge.  And just the fact that I remember that episode of Friends is probably more proof that I shouldn’t be shopping at Forever 21.

4.  As I was wandering around the store amongst a busload of tiny high school cheerleader-types, I started wondering if I should take the escalator upstairs and browse in the Plus Size section.  I’ve never actually shopped in a Plus Size store or section, but I’m starting to feel like that might be my place.  And since in Forever 21 a size 7 is a real-life size -5, that would make me a size 48.  I’m pretty sure that’s in the plus size section, right?

5.  I started feeling judged by all the cheerleaders.  Like, as they looked at me with my couple of hangers of clothes they secretly thought, “She’s not 21!  Why is she even in here?  Security!”  So, I concocted a story if anyone asked why I was in Forever 21 in the first place.  Why in world would anyone ask???  But if anyone did, I was shopping for my niece, or my little sister, or any other female in my life that is closer to the age of 21, and closer to a size -5.  And then I would tell them that I get carded at Trader Joe’s all the time.  All.  The. Time.

So, anyway, I left Forever 21 without buying a thing.  I actually abandoned my selections in a corner (The wide-brimmed hat girl will probably have to put them with the rest of the go-backs, if she doesn’t try them on and parade around the store wearing them first.)

Instead, bought a really cute top at a much more mature store.

Active.

So, what about you?  Do you still shop at Forever 21?

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Are You Ready to Rumble???

Do you have sons?  Let’s talk for a sec.  What is with all the wrestling???  It’s a boy thing, right?  I grew up in a house with sisters and I don’t remember us doing any wrestling, but boys could wrestle morning, noon, and night.  And sometimes they do.

Unless there’s blood.

Then I stop it.

Last week, I decided to make the most of all the physical contact and we did a wrestling family night!

During the day the craft was pretty simple (for the boys.)  They made up wrestling names, that sounded very macho and intimidating and drew posters.

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And then we decided to draw mustaches on their faces with washable crayola markers. I don’t know why. Don’t ask.

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I, on the other hand, grabbed a couple of old piece of fabric I had used as table clothes for a luau party and a hot glue gun and whipped up a couple of wrestling outfits.  (It’s seriously amazing what can be done with a hot glue gun.  Can I get an Amen?)

So, here is Caden the Snake with his coach, Daddy.

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And here is Jacob the Giant with his coach, Elijah.

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I got to be the “round girl.”  Geric I discussed the possibility of me wearing a bikini and heels as I paraded around the living room holding “round” signs above my head… but we decided against it.  I feel like the baggage my boys have to carry into therapy is getting kinda heavy already, so it’s time to be choosy about what else we’re adding to it, you know?  So here I am (fully clothed) holding a round sign.

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Round 1 *DING* was thumb wrestling.

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Caden was victorious!  Those pesky fine motor skills, Jacob.  Soon enough yours will be strengthened, my son.

Round 2 *DING* was arm wrestling.

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After some coaching from Geric, Jacob was able to pin Caden a couple of times.  So we called this round a tie.

Next we took a small break for dinner.  We went Asian for dinner. (Gotta love the frozen section at Trader Joe’s!)

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I know what you’re thinking… Chinese food???  Wrestling???  I don’t get the connection.  Stayed tuned for round four.

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Just as cute in a headband!

Round 3 *DING* was good-old-fashioned-pin-you-to-the-mat wrestling.  And let me tell you, this was the most fun.  Seriously.  I think the boys thought I had lost my marbles when I actually encouraged them to wrestle, but they had so much fun.  And I realized that I need to relax a little on the wrestling thing.  There were times during this round that I was sure that Jacob was going to get hurt and burst into tears, but I think he had more fun than Caden!

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See how excited Jacob is!

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Then Daddy joined in.  He couldn’t help it.  It’s in his y chromosomal tendencies.

Round 4 *DING* was sumo wrestling!  (Get the dinner connection now????  I realize that sumo wrestling is actually from Japan, while our dinner originated in China, but they’re all from the same continent, okay?)

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Hilarious, right?

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This was by far the funniest round!

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Elijah felt left out so he got in the action when the boys took their sumo outfits off.

After the wrestling was over we headed down to Cherry on Top for some frozen yogurt, which has absolutely nothing to do with wrestling, but gosh darn it, it’s good!

Oh, and before I go, there’s a new link on the sidebar of my homepage.   (If you click HERE you’ll get back to my homepage.)  Anyway, I made a button that says “Family Nights” so you can find all the Family Nights we’ve done in one simple location.

You’re welcome.

Now go have a family night!

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Goodbye Summer Family Night

I was looking through my blog a few weeks ago and I realized that I was a way better mom before I had three kids.

Truth.

I’ve heard it from a lot of mommies.  Two is doable, manageable, one-on-one team formations.  Three?  Three throws you over the edge.  I have heard though that if you can get to three and survive, then four, five, six, and so on, are no big deal.  Just throw ’em on the pile!  (Not that I will be testing out that theory.  Rest assured, I will not.  But that’s what I’ve heard.)

Anywho, Elijah has only had one Family Night with us, because my mothering skillz have been less than stellar.  But I have decided to put a stop to that.

Family Nights are back in full effect!

We’ve had two already and I plan on posting them once-a-week-ish.  (Don’t hold me to it, k?)

Here’s our first.

I decided that since school was in full swing, we should say goodbye to summer.  I also thought saying goodbye would make the terrible heat go away, and it did work for a few days, but now it’s back.  Dreadful, I tell you.

Anyway, the afternoon craft was twofold.  First the boys painted a picture of their favorite part of summer.

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Here’s their finished products.

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Caden painted his Cousin Kristyn who spent the night at our house a few times.  Jacob painted himself.

The conversation went like this:

Me: “What did you paint Jacob?”

Jacob:  “Me!”

Me:  “You’re your favorite part of summer?”

Jacob:  “Yeah.”

Oh, if we could all have such great self-esteem.

It came out later (after some coaxing from Caden) that while it is a picture of Jacob, he is roasting marshmallows at Maw and Pop’s house, so he got the concept.  😉

The second part of the afternoon craft was writing a letter to Summer saying goodbye.  I wrote it (obviously) and then they went on a sight word hunt and found different words that I called out.  They had fun with that.

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Next we started dinner prep.  We decided we had to use the BBQ so it was chicken and veggie kabobs, brown rice, fruit salad, and homemade ice cream for dessert.  (Yum, yum!)

Here are the boys helping me chop the fruit for the fruit salad.

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And here is our spread.  How about a collective, “Mmmmmmmmmm!”

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For our activity we went swimming in the pool (that is slightly green… but nothing as bad as the actual ocean so I don’t really feel bad.)

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I found some water balloons to fill up and we had a little water balloon fight.  I seemed to be the target most of the time.

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And here is a picture of the whole family.  Now a collective, “Awwwwwww!”

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After our fun in the sun, we came inside, got ready for bed and had some yummy, yummy cookies n cream chocolate chip ice cream.  I didn’t get a picture.  I was too busy licking my bowl.

Now, go out and have your own family night this week!

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Granny Goose

While we were up north we stayed at Granny Goose’s house, which is what my boys have affectionately called my mom’s mom since they have been able to speak.  It all started because my mom was asking my grandma what she wanted to be called by my kids (since “grandma” was out, according to my mom, even though she’s not even “grandma.”  She’s “Maw,” which is strikingly close to Mama, and kinda not cool when you’re a first time mom, but whatev.  Another post for another day perhaps.)

Anywho, my grandma said, “I don’t care what they call me.  They can call me Granny Goose if they want.”  I think she was joking by I was all over that like white on rice, and it stuck.

Granny Goose she is.

So, before we left to drive back home, we took a picture of the four generations.

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So cute, but does my thyroid look a little swollen?  Hmmmmm…

And just in case you thought crazy only ran on my dad’s side of the family, you would be wrong.

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“Man, I’ve been needing a shelf for my desk.”

“Here, Anne (that’s my grandma) we’ll just prop it up with cinder blocks.”

“Genius, Pete! (That’s my grandpa.)”

“Anything to save a buck, dear.”

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Everyone keeps slug and snail killer pellets from the 1950’s in a box on a shelf in their office, right?

No?

Oh.

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Family BBQ

Has anyone else noticed that it has taken five times as long to blog about our trip to Northern California than we were actually there?  We were there for less than 48 hours, but I have managed to split this trip up into, what?  Five different posts?  I’m nuts.

Anyway, after the photo shoot at the cabin, we made our way to my uncle’s house for a bar-b-que and some swimming.  I would just like to point out that the memorial had some snacks at it… you know cookies, cupcakes, bottled water.  But it was at 10am.  We all figured we were eating lunch at my uncle’s.  Right?  Would you figure that?

Nope.  He starved us until dinner time.  Not kidding.  Our stomachs could be heard growling from the neighbor’s backyard.  One of my cousins was walking around with a bowl of potato chips because the poor kid was withering away.  I repeatedly told my uncle, “We’re starving out here!”  And nothin’.  Nothin’.  ‘Til dinner.

And then he let me be first in line.  And it was delicious.  Worth the wait?  I don’t know about that.  But delicious.

Here’s some photos for your viewing pleasure.

Here’s everyone sitting around a table.  This is when we thought food would be coming at any minute.  Little did we know about the wait that we were about to endure.

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The kiddos decided to swim (probably to distract themselves from the pangs of hunger.)

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This is my cousin Andy, with his adorable daughter Caroline.  She could be a little model, right?  So stinkin’ cute!

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And here’s some more sitting around a table.  That’s the bowl of potato chips I was talking about.  It’s empty now.

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This is my uncle and I.  He’s also my godfather, and insisted that I called him that the whole day.  “Yes, Godfather…”  “What do you need, Godfather?”  “I’m sorry, Godfather.”  You know, things like that.  And yes, he’s wearing a magnet bracelet.  He’s certain that he cannot be pushed over.  I think next time I see him I’m gonna try a sneak attack to see if it really works.

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Here’s another child model.  So cute, lil’ Emma Bug.

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And here’s Elijah with his Auntie and cousin.

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These boys were like little peas in a pod.  They were pushing each other in a wagon and playing together the whole day.  It was so nice to see them meet each other and get along so well.

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After we ate (it was seriously like a scene out of Survivor the way we all ravaged the table) we had a little photo shoot with all the new cousins.

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Have you seen cuter kids?  Me neither!

And the OG Nelson cousins with our spouses and our offspring.  (Poor Steve is missing because he had to fly home early.)

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More to come tomorrow… and then I swear I’m done with this trip.

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Guest Post at Momma Be Thy Name

Awhile back I gave a shout out to my fellow blogger, Stephanie, over at Momma Be Thy Name for her fabulous post titled Why Our Parents Put Us To Shame.  (And I swear the rest of this post will not rhyme.)  Anywho, a few weeks ago she asked me to be a guest writer on her blog and of course I said yes!  So, here’s a bit of my post to entice you and then click the link over to her blog to read the rest.  (And, hey, leave a comment while you’re over there.  I have a reputation to protect here, people.  Make me feel loved!)

I live in one of the nine states that prohibit handheld cell phone usage while you are driving your car.  I get the premise behind it.  Holding a cell phone to your ear leaves only one hand on the wheel and distracts you from driving responsibly.  Although, if we’re going to ban handheld cell phones, we should probably also ban eating in your car, applying makeup in your car, and most importantly, driving in your car while children are present…  

Read the rest HERE

Goodbye Borders

I know I have to get back to our trip, but I almost forgot to post this!

When Geric and I went out last week (for the second time alone since Elijah has been born) we stopped in at Borders for their giant closing sale.  And you know what’s sadder than Geric and I only getting two nights alone in the last nine months?  Borders closing!

I know the Kindle and the Nook are the wave of the future, but I’m seriously like that woman on the commercial for the Kindle that just likes the feeling of folding down the corner of a page.  I like the actual action of turning the page and bending back the cover of a paperback.  I like the smell of a new book and the feel of an old book in my hands.  I know books aren’t gone forever, but Borders closing signifies the end of an era, people!  And I’m just not comfortable with it at all!

So, the bookshelves were obviously close to bare, but there were a few treasures, should you decide to visit and get a brand new book for 70% off.  Here are some of the winners I found that I thought my readers may be interested in.

Here’s a couple for the jr. higher in you:

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What’s Your Poo Telling You is actually a daily calendar, that if I was to buy, I would probably keep in the bathroom.  Don’t let that one get away!  And did you catch that one of the authors is an M.D.?  They’re practically medical encyclopedias, you know.

We all know that I’m a big reality TV fan.  So this one caught my eye as well.

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Exciting!!!!  This one must be riveting, on-the-edge-of-your-seat, no-I-cannot-put-this-book-down-to go-to-bed kind of reading, right?  Right?  Right.

Hello!  As if we didn’t think Hilary Duff was already talented enough, seeing as she is not only a breakout Disney star, but a pop artist (I pronounce that as arteest) and an actress, now she’s an author.  All the cool kids are doing it.  LC is an author too, you know?

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In my opinion, you can never know too much about Abba.  Never.  Never.  Never.  Tap, tap on the guy in the back in the brown leisure suit, casually leaning to the left and saying “What up, laaaaadies” with his eyes.  (Do you think his right hand is on his hip?  I’ll bet it is.)

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This unlikely duo was hanging out all alone on the top shelf of a bookcase.  They were probably discussing how they overcame their battles with alcohol.  I mean, Donna Martin almost didn’t graduate!

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Finally, I found these.  And for not being such a big reader, Sarah Palin has a lot of books written about her.  I know, I know she reads.  She just can’t remember the names of the papers she reads, or at least make one up on the fly.  My favorite is the one in the middle that calls her a “conservative superstar” because it makes me think of Mary Katherine Gallagher.

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So, in case you haven’t already, make your way down to your local Borders and buy some real live books before they become as obsolete as an 8 track.

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